Subject: How we Shower

[tlspiegel]

How to Shower Like a Woman
1.Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
2.Walk into bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
3.If you see your husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
4.Look at your womanly physique in the mirror. Make mental note...Must do more situps.
5.Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long
loofah, wide loofah, and pumice stone.
6.Wash your hair with Cucumber Sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
7.Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
8.Condition your hair with Grapefruit Mint conditioner, enhanced with natural avocado oil.
9.Leave on hair for fifteen minutes.
10.Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for ten minutes, until red.
11.Wash entire rest of body with Ginger Nut and Jaffa Cake body wash.
12.Rinse conditioner off hair. You must make sure that it has all come off.
13.Shave armpits and legs.
14.Consider shaving bikini area, but decide to get it waxed instead.
15.Scream loudly when your husband flushes the toilet and you lose the
water pressure.
16.Turn off shower.
17.Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
18.Spray mold spots with Tilex. Get out of shower.
19.Dry with towel the size of a small country.
20.Wrap hair in super absorbent second towel.
21.Check entire body for the remotest sign of a zit.
22.Tweeze hairs.
23.Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
24.If you see your husband along the way, cover any exposed areas, then sashay to bedroom to spend an hour and a half getting dressed.

How to Shower Like a Man

1.Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed.
2.Leave them in a pile.
3.Walk naked to the bathroom.
4.If you see your wife along the way, shake wiener at her, making
the "woo-woo" sound.
5.Look at your manly physique in the mirror and suck in your gut to see if you have pecs. (you don't)
6.Admire the size of your wiener in the mirror and scratch your
A**.
7.Get in shower.
8.Don't bother to look for a washcloth...You don't use one.
9.Wash your face.
10.Wash your armpits.
11.Blow your nose in your hands, then let the water just rinse it
off.
12.Crack up at how loud your farts sound in the shower.
13.Majority of time is spent washing your privates and surrounding area.
14.Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs on the soap bar.
15.Shampoo your hair.
16.Do not use conditioner.
17.Make a shampoo Mohawk.
18.Peek out of shower curtain to look at yourself in the mirror
again.
19.Pee (in the shower).
20.Rinse off and get out of the shower.
21.Fail to notice water on the floor because you left the curtain
hanging out of the tub the whole time.
22.Partially dry off.
23.Look at yourself in the mirror. Flex muscles. Admire the wiener
size again.
24.Leave shower curtain open and wet bath mat on the floor.
25.Leave bathroom fan and light on.
26.Return to the bedroom with towel around your waist.
27.If you pass your wife, pull off the towel, shake wiener at her,
and make the "woo-woo" sound again.
28.Throw wet towel on the bed.
29.Take 2 minutes to get dressed.

[freesurfer]

OMG!! I'm just rollin' Toby Lee!!


Thanks for the laugh!!

[tlspiegel]

Originally posted by freesurfer
OMG!! I'm just rollin' Toby Lee!!


Thanks for the laugh!!

SIL sent it to me. Gonna' edit it to make it readable. lol

[misha123]

ROFLMAO............Ok who the heck knows how I shower? LOL and yep hubby is explained perfect in this thread! Good one!!!!

[couponmomma]

Too funny & oh so true (especially the men)
and don't forget they leave the wet towel on the bed until it leaves a nice wet spot and you set on it after you have gotten dressed!!!!

[Shainie]

Originally posted by Uvgtml
4.If you see your wife along the way, shake wiener at her, making the "woo-woo" sound.

OMG that is too funny - and too true!!!

We just went through this last night, DH asked why I take so long in the tub. There's a lot to do in there! I have about 11 products in there for me, and all he has is shampoo and soap.

[valleygirl]

OMG! thanks for the laugh.

[tasker109]

hehe....thats such a hoot......does anybody else dress in another part of the house so hubby doesnt get obnoxious while you are dressing and arent in the mood for nonsense??? i do but dont tell on me, please!!

[tlspiegel]

Originally posted by tasker109
hehe....thats such a hoot......does anybody else dress in another part of the house so hubby doesnt get obnoxious while you are dressing and arent in the mood for nonsense??? i do but dont tell on me, please!!

Your secret is safe with me. Aw... I need some excitement in my life...









Tasker... I took out a full page ad in the Arizona Republic... names, addresses, email addys, phone numbers, and any other pertinent information. Will be published on Sunday March 24, 2002. You might have to move! lol

[PHReD]

Thats it to a T!!!!

Gotta love 4 and 27...

[amyaccident]

HAHAHA.....ROFLMAO!!! That is SO funny & so true it actually scarey!!

[KensLuv22]

OMG! LMAO!!

I won't need to do crunches anymore, I'll just come in here and read this!! Thanks Toby Lee!


UGH! My gut hurts!!


Woo-Woo!!!

[paradise45]

FUNNY-FUNNY-FUNNY!!!

Has someone been watching us take our showers? I can totally relate!