If your spouse asked you to limit your time on the computer would you?

[miriama59]

I was reading how Al Roker, out of respect for his wife, limits his time on the Net for one hour after dinner. This way they have more time to be together, play games, watch TV together, whatever.

So I got to thinking what if your spouse or your kids asked you to limit your time on the Net? I know that a lot of us jokingly talk about being addicted to DOD.

But what if your spouse asked you to limit your time? What if they were upset with your time on the Net and wanted you to spend more time with your family? Would you?

[texas_sweetie]

Hmmm.......nope. Although hubby wouldn't ask me that , he knows how much I enjoy my pc. just like i wouldn't ask him to give up his tv or garden. He loves it too much. Anyway most of the time when I'm on here he is next to me watching Tv, nice thing , having pc and tv in the bedroom. We spend lots of time in here.

[pandybat]

We've gone round and round on this topic several times. As soon as hubby decides to stay home once in a while and put up his bowfishing bow, his bowhunting bow, rifle, camo clothes and boat, I will shut down the pc. I think I'm pretty safe for a while....lol

It kinda like a trade-off. If my husband was the sit around in the lounge chair and watch tv for the rest of the night kinda guy, it would probably be a different story. He never sits around. He is always off doing something. I'm not complaining....lol

The way I see it, right now it's too cold to be outside, the house is clean, the baby is fed and the bills are paid. If I have to sit in the house for the rest of the time, what else should I do? If he asked me to limit my time, I don't really know what else I would do with that extra time. Read?....nah Sew?....nah And I can only be a 3 year old playmate to my daughter for so long each day before I wanna rip my hair out. This is my time and my thang. Deal with it....lol

[miriama59]

I agree Sandy. I have my time on the puter though I limit it to some extent when Bill is home. Only because I want to be with him.

He is a member here too so he understands my time on the Net and he is so proud of my winning. He gets on when he can though it is not as much as he would like. Lucky we have two computers.

I think the point of this article was WHAT IF your husband suddenly wanted to spend his time with you? What if he wanted to play games, etc.? What if your kids came up and said "hey, come play with me"--how many could give it up?

I think it is another play on the old theme like when one of you retires and wants to suddenly be there ALL THE TIME. I know my mom is dealing with this right now. My stepdad has been retired for a year and he is driving her INSANE! They might even get a divorce after all these years, over 25 years together !!!!


It was also dealing with the issues of internet addiction which is happening more and more often...

[pandybat]

Originally posted by miriama59
I think the point of this article was WHAT IF your husband suddenly wanted to spend his time with you? What if he wanted to play games, etc.? What if your kids came up and said "hey, come play with me"--how many could give it up?

Well...yeah!.....If he suddenly wanted to spend time with me, sure, I would drop anything to be with him or my daughter. Because WHAT IF they suddenly weren't there anymore to spend time with?

There are alot of other things I would rather be doing but due to certain circumstances, I can't always do them when I want.

Now if he said give it up completely, I would have to say no. I have learned too much, experienced too much and use this computer too much for other things I am interested in or enjoy. I enjoy gardening and finding gardening information on the web is a huge thrill for me. Geneology, important facts, books, shopping, news....all of this is stuff I already do and using the internet just furthers the enjoyment I get out of those things. It's like an encylopedia of knowledge at my fingertips. And it's so much faster than finding it in a book. If he can't understand my enjoyment in that, then I would just ask him to go try and shoot a deer during deer season without using a weapon and see how he likes it....lol It's an extension of some of my hobbies as his weapons are to his hobbies.

Limit my time.....sure. Give it up completely......no way. We just couldn't be together 24/7 without killing each other and this is what I like to do when I have my own time.

As far as internet addiction goes, I'm not real sure what to make of it. Everyone has their addictions in one form or another and have to eventually deal with the consequences. I wonder if internet addiction will ever be recognized as a disease?? Someone is bound to cross that line someday and use that excuse in court or in their divorce decree. "Guilty by reason of internet addiction" LOL

Sounds like your step-dad could use a hobby or two. Is there anything that he is really interested in that he could be encouraged to expand upon?

[miriama59]

My step-dad is bored and being an ***. Retirement is really hard on some couples.

Me, I would not mind it at all. We both have our own things we like to do. Bill loves to tinker in his shop and draw, etc. So we would not have a problem with it.


Sadie has come up and asked me to get off the computer before and I have. I didn't really want to, I was having fun at DOD, but like you said, she is not always going to be here. AND she most definitely is NOT going to want to spend time with me so much as she gets older.

[tasker109]

i would if he asked me to but there would be no reason to. the computer and the tv are in the same room and while im on the computer, hes on the tv. that would be like me asking him to limit his time on the tv!! as we sit here, i share what i find on the net. when i chuckle....he says....what? what? when i groan, he says what? what??? information, research, jokes, communication, there is no end to what the computer means to me. i used to scour encyclopedias, now its the net. besides theres stuff on the net, that wouldnt ever be in the pedias. ie, current sports records or movie information. ([Only registered and activated users can see links. Either login above or Register Now] is the best thing since cheese and crackers). it will be 6 years in april since our first computer and life hasnt been the same since! for the better for sure!! when someone would say, what was tonto's horses name? i would rattle my brain and groan for days trying to remember.....now all i do is type "tonto's horse" in the google search box...and i find it......scout!!

[The Bunny]

It's really not an issue for us -- DH loves it that I now have a hobby. He loves to garden and I was always wanting him to get cleaned up and go do something with me. Now I have something to occupy myself and he loves being able to garden guilt-free. We have time set aside for things we do together and we always sit down at the dining room table and eat together. But if it did become an issue, we would sit down and find a compromise that we both could live with.

[Mouse7088]

If Kenny asked to step away for awhile because he wanted to spend more time with me or with all as a family...I would do it. There are times I think I bore him to no end so when ever he asks "Hey, wanna go here or there, just us.." or "wanna take the boys to..." I get like a kid myself and can't get my feet to move fast enough. I know it sounds pathetic, but there are times I crave time with my hubby, knowing he was going to not do one of his hobbies also just for me would probably make me cry.
He works all day w/ some pretty good people. It's like he gets his adult interaction out of his system before he even gets home..like any SAHMs know, you can only carry on a conversation with a child for so long before you both become bored to death..lol. I need the PC during the day especially to keep my sanity. lol.
Now about JUST the kids..I already put them first..if they need help, I am more than willing to stop playing on the PC, if they want to talk, again I more than willing..if they want to play a game or something, I will do that also, but a child can play the same game all day long over and over if you allow it and well..I am not willing to do that!!! LOL! Contrary to what some folks think about SAHM, are jobs aren't to play with the kids all day

Kenny and I had a little tiff about the SAHM thing yesterday. I NEVER thought he would purposely hurt my feelings over this, so it came as a shock when he did..what was more shocking is that he thought it was a "joke"..there wasn't anything joking about it, it was mean..PERIOD...soooooo even tho I am still licking my wounds over this, I would still be willing to give up some of my PC time for my family.

[wss4]

I admit that I spend more time than I should on the computer. I try to limit it to when my DH is not home so that he does not mind. (He is actually jealous of my PC ) LOL

Being a SAHM also who only gets out of the house to grocery shop or pick up the kids from school, I need something to save my sanity and my PC is it.

[amyaccident]

Hubby & I have actually went round & round about this!! Until we bought another puter & got em networked together!!Now we can actually play games or whatever on here, & while I am at DOD he is looking for vette stuff!! And as for the internet addiction thing.....been there! All I can say is thank god for an understanding hubby. I had to get rid of my puter for a little over a year , it was tought at first but as time went by I realized how much I really was on that thing then!! I was on ALL the time AND I wasn't doing anything as constructive as DOD!!!

NOPE!!!!!!!

[Mouse7088]

I'd like to add a little something about my answer..I WOULD soend less time online if he said something like "Mind staying off the PC tonight so we can spend some quality time together?" Like THAT would ever happen..lol..now if he just said I think you need to spend less time online...well...I would think he needs to get use to going "without" a little sumpin', sumpin'! LOL!

[tlspiegel]

Ooooh Boy! What a question. My answer will only reflect what I think about dh, dw... not dkids. That's a separate issue all moms and dads would have to decide for themselves.

OK! When I was just about flippin' out disgusted with my marriage and the confines (we spent 24/7 together and mostly we enjoyed the time together, until things started unraveling) I decided I wanted to write. I bought a word processor. (My first "computer" lol.) Well... I was addicted to this little machine and couldn't get enough time on it. He was soooo jealous. It amazed me. When he wanted to do something on his own, when things were good with us... I found something to do, or would just go for a walk/run. (I wasn't allowed to have any friends - that's another story I don't think about anymore.) So I would clean the apt., or read, watch tv, do what I could to keep me sane.

This word processor drove him nutz. We got divorced, I moved out - staying nearby in the same complex in my own place. He came over a few times to chat and his demeaning attitude really shocked me. I had found something that only I could do, and he was the epitome of the ignorant soul who didn't understand or want to understand the workings of something he just couldn't have control over.

I know, in my heart... had we stayed together I never would have gotten a computer, and progressed as I have as a human. Like the others said: the internet is a huge experience for knowledge and learning. I have made friends (oh that would have p**sed him off!) and I have grown as a person.

Anyone who ends up with me, will know I am 'into the internet' and it's a big part of my life.

[Corganiacs]

well my dad told me to get a new job cuz i just sit on my arse all day and enter sweeps. so im going to get another one. might as well be rolling in some spending money... cuz so far NO BIG WINS!!!!!!


my dad is an authoritarian!!!!! Isnt every parent? Or maybe im just a special case!